Today’s Thoughtful Thursday post comes from a quote that Real Simple included in their Daily Thought (a favorite email blast of mine!). My mom actually saw it first and sent it to me before I had even checked my email. Last week, I underwent a minor medical procedure to help with a recurring health problem. This is something I have faced over the last year and a half. It’s pretty much been a never ending process of doctor’s appointments and tests to get to the root of the problem. Luckily, I recently found an incredible doctor who I trust and who has finally shed some light on what’s been happening. I underwent a minor procedure last week and spent the weekend home with my parents recovering. This procedure went very well and I should hopefully see improvement in the weeks to come.
That being said, this entire process has been a pretty difficult road for me. When I graduated, I thought my biggest issue would be finding a job, dealing with a crazy roommate, or countless other #realworldproblems. I never thought I would have to deal with a recurring health issue on a daily basis on top of all the other madness from day to day life. This year has tested me in more ways than one.
One of the most important things I have learned is that, in life, you cannot just stop the world until a problem goes away. You have to keep moving forward. I think in some ways I limited myself in the last year. There was so much unknown and I was constantly saying “no” in an attempt to rest, when in actuality I think I needed to keep living my life regardless of the pain. I need to work hard at staying true to who I am, and that’s someone who loves to experience new things, rarely says “no” to an adventure, and who bends over backwards for her friends. I need to always remember who I am. That is the anchor that I must cling to in life. I think I have allowed the pain to get into my head and scare me in a way that is more damaging than physical pain. I put far too much emphasis on being the Allison before this health concern and getting back to that person. But I know deep down that I will be forever changed. Just like in any stage of life, there are different versions of yourself, some that you may look back on and hardly recognize.
I am hopeful for improvements in the next few weeks, but I know that no matter what happens, this has been an important lesson for me. I don’t want to let fear or pain keep me from living my life. I am thankful to my family who has supported me throughout this frustrating and never-ending process. And I am thankful to the few friends I have shared this with. They have been so understanding and supportive throughout this entire process. You may be surprised by this, but I am not exactly a big sharer when it comes to my personal problems. So even telling my closest friends about this was weird for me, but they continually prove that I need to open up more because their love and encouragement is unbelievable. Strangely, writing this blog has allowed me to open up in an entirely new way and I am okay to share this piece of my life with you lovely readers! Something I never would have done before.
I know that today’s post is a little heavier than my usual Thoughtful Thursdays. But I think the quote from Nitika Chopra helped sum up the thoughts I’ve been having as of late. In life there will always be a new challenge or obstacle to overcome, and the only thing you can do is keep pushing forward. At the end of the day, I want to be able to look back and be proud of who I am and what I have accomplished no matter what the circumstances. Life is not easy, and the challenges force us to question everything and decide who we truly are, deep down underneath it all.