Thoughtful Thursday: Having vs. Making Time

its_not_about_having_time_it_s_about_making_time

I came across this post on Pinterest the other day and could not help but stop and reread it over and over again. This pretty much sums up something that has been swirling around in my head as of late. I’ve mentioned before that moving to Manhattan and starting a new job has come with its challenges, including making friends. That being said, I have made some pretty wonderful friends at work and I am slowly making more in the other different activities I am getting involved in. Meeting new people reminds me of endless rounds of sorority recruitment, exhausting but amazing when you truly connect with someone! Although I am actively trying to meet new people, I want to make sure I never stop making time for my friends.

The “busy” syndrome is nothing new, and I will admit that I have succumbed to it many times before (mostly in college) but I tried to always make time for the people I care about. The difference now is that instead of huge exams or 20+ page papers taking up my time, it is long days at the office that make me want to just crawl into bed and sleep. There have been a few moments in the last few months where I considered cancelling my plans and just heading home. I was usually just exhausted from the day and the idea of extending it did not sound even remotely appealing. However, I have tried to remind myself to keep saying “yes” to opportunities. I try and push away those frantic “I’m so busy” or “I’m so tired from being so busy” thoughts, because frankly they aren’t entirely true. I think sometimes I just allow myself to get caught up in the idea of being “busy.” Sometimes I wonder if being “busy” is just a mask for avoiding problems or appearing perfect. I know that I am WAY more productive when I am busy, but sometimes I allow my stresses to take over and use my so called busyness as an excuse. It is a cycle that I am constantly working to try and break.

So instead of cancelling, I take a deep breath and decide to go to the event/drinks/meetings etc. as planned. Every. Single. Time. I went to these events, I was glad I did. It wasn’t an earth shattering experience like an incredible concert or a celebrity filled gala, but instead simply connecting with people. I head back home exhausted in a fulfilled way, rather than one filled with frantic energy. When I walk home, I am always happy that I made time for those moments.

Looking at our current culture, it is clear that the “I’m so busy” theme is here to stay. I know that we are all guilty of this phrase. As a result, this concept has made me reflect on many of my friendships. We are all attempting to make sense of this path after college, one that does not have any set rules or grades. Everyone is off on their own adventure, trying to figure out who they want to be and where they want to go next. As a result, many of my friendships have certainly shifted. It has been interesting to see the people who are willing to make the time for me, and vice versa. At the end of the day,  I know that my closest friends and I choose to make what time we have work. It may take a few weeks between Skype dates of lengthy chats over drinks, but when we find the time it is always worth it.

I hope that you remember to make time for the people you care about, because we are all “busy.” But putting away that word for the evening and spending time together makes you forget about everything on your running to do list. At the end of the day, we all have “no time” so it means that much more when we choose to spend it with the people we care about most.

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